The theme @friendlymoose has chosen for his photo contest this week is: WHITE. And let this theme have that special meaning for me.
Let me say I have a love/hate relationship with WHITE. In our house, the walls are basically all white, the frames are white, the doors are white, and I hate it. It is far too sterile, cold and has no personality. For 8 years I have been discussing this with my partner to bring some color, character and personality into the house by adding some color. We almost always agree on interior styles, but here we have a big difference of opinion. And until we completely agree, nothing happens…
But there are other things in my life where I absolutely love WHITE.
The most important white in my life, of course, has been my wonderful WHITE GERMAN SHEPHERD ROWAN.
For 11 years I have been able to call this fantastic dog my best friend. He really was my dog, wherever I was, there he was. Of all the dogs I've had in my life, Rowan was the dog that was 100% focused on me. As long as I was around, he was happy.
Of course I've already told so much about Rowan, and everyone thinks his/her dog is the greatest dog ever. I am no exception in that regard. But even for the greatest of dogs, there comes a time when you have to let them go.
That moment came for us on December 21, 2019, from that day on, Rowan has exchanged earthly life for eternal life. An anal gland tumor has become fatal to him.
A part of me died too
I've told you so many times about Rowan, about how special he was to me. But what I've never really talked about since he passed away is how much I missed him, and how much I miss him every day. The day he died, a part of me died too.
And that part that died in me has still not been brought back to life by the presence of 3 dogs in the house. The part that died apparently contains a large part of my motivation for photography. Rowan was able to let me feel that bit of carefree enjoyment every time.
Rowan and Photography
Rowan was a dog who got happy just when I grabbed my camera in my hand. He started watching me from that moment on, and estimating where to walk, sit, lie down, stand ... everything just to get into the picture. With Rowan it was so easy to do dog photography. He was the dog that made Myla easy to photograph, he was a born fashion model. His striking white appearance suddenly made the landscapes more beautiful to look at, and he gave me the ability to see something new in the same environment every day. I have not felt that same inspiration after his death.
Photography and Rowan were so inextricably linked to me, it was always the same. I grabbed my camera to leave and Rowan was glued to my leg to go along with me. Like an enthusiastic happy puppy. Together we went out into the wide world to take new pictures.
Dreaming of new adventures with Skipper
Of course, I still have three dogs around me now. But Myla and Lana are both too old to go on these adventures now. So I dream of the day when I can do the same with Skipper. But Skipper is a different dog, he's not like Rowan. He is less easy to take with you on an adventure, Skipper is not a dog that gets happy from a camera. Skipper is also not a dog that can easily go everywhere with you. I didn't have to keep an eye on Rowan. He kept an eye on me and didn't go far from me. Skipper doesn't go far from me either if there's nothing or no one to see. With Skipper, I have to focus completely on the environment AND on Skipper, which makes it difficult to carry a camera with me. In addition, Skipper finds all-new environments so exciting that he becomes completely hyper. Rowan could do that just fine.
Well, every dog is different, and of course, it made a difference that I took Rowan home as a 9-week-old puppy, and Skipper had already been 1 year old when he came here. Of course, I love Skipper as much as I loved, (and still love) Rowan! Let there be no doubt about that. I love all my dogs, they are worth everything to me. But that very special feeling, that very special bond … I only had that with Rowan.
My white everything!