Mother always told us while growing up that family was greater than everything and that family never left anyone behind, because of this we observed that she always made so many sacrifices for our father, and even when he brought his illegitimate child home one Christmas Eve, she never complained.

We grew up always protecting our family and even when things became toxic, we never left, well, until our father passed on. His death felt like a key to the cage we called our family and after his funeral, we all dispersed like prey running away from a predator and after leaving our home, days turned into months and months into years.

We promised each other to always visit home but for me, the thought of going back felt like a bad nightmare, the kind that made you scared of sleeping so I never returned home. Usually, I would always call back home to check up on my mother because it seemed like the right thing to do but I always made sure to keep my location as vague as possible.

After a few years of traveling around and seeing the world, I had met Aden and he made me want to start a family with him, he removed the fear I had and it felt like it was going to be a happy ending for me after all.

A year passed and things became a bit crazy, Aden lost his job and we had to take a second mortgage on our house, and due to this Aden resulted in gambling and alcoholism, and while he was never violent, it still felt like I had lost the man I loved.

I spent some time trying to figure out what could save our marriage from dying and all signs pointed towards a child but boy was I wrong because after having our first child things escalated and became even worse than it was, our debts were climbing and it forced me to take a second job which made life harder on me since I had to take every financial burden in our home.

People always said that having one child opened a door for more and before I could realize it, I was having my fourth. Things didn’t change at all and our marriage wasn’t saved by a child or four and after six years of marriage, it felt like we were strangers renting the same house.

I could remember the first time I ever planned on leaving, I had felt miserable after work and all I wanted was to be held but Aden was nowhere to be found as usual and I had cried myself to sleep. I had packed my bags and that of the kids but my mother's voice kept ringing in my head “family never left anyone behind” so I stayed and continued to stay until one fateful day.

Aden woke up that morning and for the first time in almost six years, he was sober and he made breakfast for the kids, he swept the house and he felt like the man that I fell in love with years ago, I couldn’t help but wonder what was happening but he looked so happy so I just wanted to enjoy the moment. He said he had the day planned out for us and indeed he had because we had a beautiful day and when we got home and I was making plans to surprise him for the night, he handed me a letter.

“What is this?” I asked and he simply replied that he wanted a divorce because he had met someone who changed his life and showed him a new perspective on how to live, he said he was packing his bag and moving in with her and that when he figured things out, he would surely provide me with some child support.

He picked up his bags to leave and all I could say was “I didn’t leave because family never left anyone behind so why would you leave us?" and his reply opened my eyes, he simply said “family wasn’t a chain that held you bound” and he left.

I would never regret my children but maybe if I had left earlier things wouldn’t be like it was right now, I had wasted my years and my energy for a marriage that didn’t work out, and while in thought I heard a little voice screaming at me “mummy, mummy, wake up” and on waking up I could see myself back on the first day that I planned on leaving with the kids and in this timeline, I packed our bags and walked away.

The End.