Happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts. A big refreshing breath, and slowly let it out. All the worries merge with the condensation of my breath and get lost with it in the vast atmosphere. Every step into the soft undisturbed snow buries the troubling thoughts deeper into the earth. But eventually, they'll show up again, just like everything the snow hides under its layers, only for summer to reveal them again.
We interpret things based on our predisposed beliefs. That is why feasibly changing our beliefs when confronted with factually backed contradictions is a sign of strength. But having a motivated perception, where we see what we want to see, isn't all that bad. For me, it was a calming hymn.
Watching the grandma play with her granddaughter in a playground abandoned and covered in snow was a bigger metaphor than it actually is. With the growing tensions on the border, I can't seem to find peace in my mind, but this seemingly simple scene helped a lot.
Watching the two, very distant generations play together in an isolated playground felt like it was screaming "At the end of the day, life goes on". There wasn't a thread of worry in their faces or any of the faces I came across on the walk. It was calm and serene. I hope it stays that way.
When the cold weather turns away and the snow starts to melt, I hope things go back to normal. Every year it is the same thing. Winter comes around, threats start flying about. This time it just seems so much more serious.
I felt like I was surrounded by metaphors. Everywhere I looked I found subliminal messages. I realized it wasn't the case. I am just desperate enough to find something that calms me, even in things where nothing exists. If you'd see this piece of land with nothing but tree bark in it, what would you think? I thought it meant that "This will pass, and the green leaves will grow again".
It is always nice to do some soul searching. I hate conjuring things up inside me. Even if I don't let it out to anyone, I at least try confronting them. That way I understand what a sane thought to have and when I am a little too close to the edge.
I didn't go too far away from the city this time. Couldn't muster up the courage. I have my things packed and a destination in mind if the war breaks out. So I just went outside to clear my head. Get those freaky ideas out of my head and reflect on them a little bit.
"What must happen, will happen."
Fin.
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